The last of us Episode 7 uncut

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Another heart wrencher!! We finally see the stockers today. We are heading into a past story as Ellie tries desperately to save Joe. This episode delves into the trauma Ellie has felt in the past from abandonment  but also never letting someone she cares about die again! Riley is her best friend but she has a bit deeper feelings for her and as the story progresses they find themselves in a serious predicament. Why do they keep hinting that Ellie has had to do something terrible in her past to someone she severely loves, are we hinting into a mercy kiling?