My New Normal Chapter 13 The Final Chapter

We started in Venice, and we went to Milan and Rome. We toured the cities by scooter. It was a lot of fun! The jet lag was a new experience, but we managed to cope. The food was fabulous. The site was breathtaking. Tammy and I did a little shopping in Milan. Tammy went a little overboard shopping, but she could afford it! I wasn't complaining or judging, nor was Chris!

When we returned to Savannah, Georgia my phone started blowing up. It was Jeremy's mother, he locked himself in the bathroom and wouldn't come out. He was threatening to do harm to himself. Chris drove us straight to their house.

When we arrived at their home, a police car and an ambulance were already outside. Jeremy's parents called 911. Jeremy refused to talk to anyone besides me. Chris sat with his parents while I went to counsel Jeremy through the bathroom door.

The police officer wouldn't leave claiming it was for my safety.

I explained that if he wanted to resolve the situation, he needed to leave due to doctor/patient confidentiality!

Jeremy sounded so similar to me at that age. Several things ran through my mind all at once. I used my childhood memories and training and talked to him. Jeremy explained to me his confusion and how much he enjoyed the warm feeling he experienced wearing tights and satin slips. His parents freaked out when he decided to wear clear lip gloss at dinner.

I knew right then, I needed to use hypnotherapy on all three of them to find a bridge of communication for all of them. This was the favorite and effective tool of Dr. Reid! She taught me how to use it in extreme situations like this, especially when the trust between the child and parents is broken.

After three exhausting hours, Jeremy came out. He had threatened bodily harm to himself, but he didn't hurt himself or possess a weapon of any kind. This was a loud cry for help. Jeremy was taken to the hospital and sedated for his safety.

The next morning I had Jeremy's parents in my office for over two hours. I hypnotized each of them individually to find out exactly how they felt and reacted to Jeremy's self-expression. What I found out was shocking!

Jeremy's mother was open to her son's issues and exploring his emotions and Identity.

His father, while not cruel, was doing everything he could to man up his son. Jeremy was resisting his father's wishes. Not because of hating his father, but because, like me, he wasn't good at any boy-type sports. He failed to perform like other boys.

He found his interest in aerobics and Yoga with his mother. He was interested in dancing. Jeremy's father slipped up calling his son a fairy! It was a mistake of frustration. His father apologized immediately, but it cut Jeremy to his core, and he locked himself in the bathroom.

Jeremy's mother didn't say anything to protect him. Despite all of their apologies, Jeremy was shattered and broken. Trust was lost between the parents and the child. Jeremy felt lost and alone. Jeremy didn't have anywhere to go. I arranged for Jeremy to stay at a well-care facility about a half-hour drive from the city.

I visited him on Wednesday and Saturday mornings. On Saturday, I brought him some of my old clothes and my first tennis outfit, the one Charlene bought for me. I kept it as a good luck heirloom. His mother bought him some lip gloss and mascara.

I suggested that Jeremy should dress however way felt most comfortable with.

While Jeremy was being cared for I was seeing his parents twice a week at two hours per visit, including hypnotherapy. It was very clear his parents loved him, but they're were problems in the marriage before Jeremy's issues surfaced!

I attempted multiple times to assist them in reconciling with each other, but it was too late. Both parents wanted full custody of Jeremy. His father was determined to man him up. His mother wanted Jeremy to be happy regardless of his dysphoria.

On the first Wednesday after I dropped off the clothes, I went to visit with him.

Jeremy was dressed in my tennis outfit and had new white sneakers with pink trim. He was wearing lip gloss and mascara. He looked happy and healthier! He was eating regularly now, and his skin color and appearance weren't as lethargic as before. He sounded a lot happier. I remember that feeling parentsame to terms with it.

I knew immediately what Jeremy needed and whandh parent to recommend for custody.

Jeremy stayed at the WellCare facility for almost three months. Jeremy's parents agreed to divorce, and his mother was given full custody, alimony, an. child support.

Just as I feared, Jeremy's father started distancing himself from his son. Six months after the divorce he took a job out of state and was never heard from again. The ch came, but no birthday cards, no calls, not even a letter or email to explain.

Jeremy started a different school in sixth grade, dressing as a girl. Jeremy's mother kept their weekthereppointnts with me. I documented everything very carefully, just in case he decided to do what I did..

As you read this, you might think I pushed him into femininity! Nothing could be ther from the truth. I gave Jennifer and his parents options and let his heart and soul guide him. Jeremy is now attending school and dance classes as Jennifer. Jennifer loves tap and Jazz dancing. Jennifer and her mother do aerobics and yoga twice a week together!

I finally understood what Dr. Chandler was talking about with me all those years ago. About the law and ethics concerning our practice and the patient. Jennifer spoke about those warm feelings she experienced when she started dressing as a girl.

Jennifer no longer feels she needs or wants to harm herself. She is bubbly, happy, and confident.

Chris and I went shopping on our first anniversary. We bumped into Jennifer and her mother. They were shopping for a Comic-Con costume. Talk about déjà vu!

Who's your character? I asked her.

Mystique, Jennifer answered!

Don't worry about it! I exclaimed.have a Mystique costume and I think it will fit you perfectly! I said.

Chris looked at me with a surprising smile. You were a Comic-Con fan? He asked.

I sure was! So was Amy and Tammy! We played Fortnite together too! All in our favorite characters! I said.

I play Fortnite with my friends a too! Jennifer said.

Jennifer's mother smiled.

Now I know why you bonded so well with my daughter!

We have a lot in common! I said.

I'll bring the costume in when I see you again! I said.

We have it cleaned before we return it! Jennifer's mother said.

Don't bother, it's a reward for her trusting me and trusting herself! I said. Besides it doesn't fit me anymore! I said.

Thank you! Jennifer hugged me!

You're welcome! I said.

Jennifer so happy made my heart flutter! Chris saw my face and smiled.

We parted our ways and went back to shopping.

I always wondered why you put up with the stress of your practice! That felt rewarding, and I was just standing here!

It's not always like that! I said. However, it's times like this and patients like them that make everything worthwhile! I said.

4 years later

Chris a,nd I were very close to our goal of buying a house when, within a week of each other, we were offered the opportunity to buy out our respective practices. The down payment was going to wipe out a majority of our house savings.

We bought them. Money was a bit tight for us for the next 18 months. We worked longer hours, almost like we were in medical school again. The only difference was that we have our nights and weekends together.

Six months after I took over the practice, I had an appointment with Jennifer and her mother. She was 14 years old, now. She was taking natural supplements to feminize herself. She looked beautiful, happy, and very perky!

I'm ready! Jennifer said!

For? I knew what she was going to say, but as a therapist and doctor, it's bad practice to put words in other people's mouths.

I want the surgery to be a woman! Jennifer said with glee!

Are you certian? I asked

Both of you need to be on the same page here! Because once you are six months into the change there's no going back! And once the surgery is complete, you can't undo it! I said with firm caution.

I'm sure! Jennifer said with confidence.

We both are! Jennifer's mother said. I'll make a call! But be aware, getting early approval requires a lot of time and documentation! You will have to produce witnesses to speak on your behalf due to her age. Even then it's not guaranteed! I speak from experience! Jennifer, do you by any chance have a diary? I asked.

3 volumes! Jennifer said.

You never told me that! Her mother that exclaimed.

That's kinda the point, mom! Jennifer said.

She has a point! I said. We laughed together.

It can take a while to get approval, so be prepared for a long process. This can take up to a year, maybe longer! You could go to Thailand, but they are going to require similar documentation and the only thing you will save money on is the surgery itself. Either way, it works out about the same! I told them.

What do you need? Jennifer's mother asked.

We need all her records and personal documentation to discuss her case with the hospital and Dr. Chandler. I also wanted to consult with Dr Reid. I knew the process may have changed in the almost 15 years since I went through it. The one thing I did know was that documentation is the key!

They filled out all of the documents.

How soon before we hear anything? Jennifer asked!

I could tell she was anxious and ready.

First things first! Take this, go to the lab at the hospital, and give them this for your blood and urine lab work. I can legally write you a prescription for a very low dose of estrogen. This will soften your skin and slow down body and facial hair growth,.

Do not! I repeat, do not take more than prescribed! We need to see how your body responds to the estrogen. Overdosing is dangerous! You will be getting annual lab testing. If I see any signs of overdosing, the deal is off, and you can find another doctor!

This is serious business; do not treat this lightly. Everything you do from now until you meet with an approval board will reflect on whether you even get considered for approval, which is rare! I know how much you want this, but be warned, varying from my instructions will ruin any chance for approval.

I have heard of others getting the same thing in less time and trouble! Jennifer's mother said.

I heard that too! The difference is my ethics, for one! The legality of minors in transition without proper professional medical and psychological guidance, for the second. And third, the safety and well-being of the patient! This isn't a game or something you can turn off and on! This is a one-way trip! You're either happy and successful or you end up regretting it for the rest of your life with no way to fix it!

So you're saying this is the only way? Jennifer's mom asked.

It is if you want my help and do this legally and correctly, yes! In your particular case, it's the only way! Otherwise, you will risk losing custody of your child, and she will end up state-raised or with her father.

I haven't heard from my dad since the divorce! Jennifer said.

Then she would become a ward of the state. I said.

We'll do it! Jennifer's mother said. See ya next week?

Until then! I said. Lab work first! Once I've reviewed the results, I'll prescribe the initial hormone prescription. Make sure you don't eat 16 hours before the tests! I said.

Thanks doc! Jennifer said.

Immediately after our session I called Dr. Reid!

I know exactly how you feel, Donna! I felt emotionally drained after our first conversation about the full transition. I knew the subject would come up, but nothing prepared you for it!

We talked for about 20 minutes, and Dr. Reid agreed to review my diagnosis and assist with my consultation with Dr. Chandler.

Having everything in order I called Dr. Chandler.

I have a good and professional relationship with him. Over my years in practice, He and Dr. Reid have been a source of inspiration and guidance for me. I followed his career over the years and learned more about my profession than school could ever teach.

I'd be happy to review your case, Donna! I can't make any promises. If what you say is true, you should have a solid case for committee review. I'm going to assume you warned them that approval is very rare.

Yes doctor! (I always referred to him as doctor, out of respect) I told them my limits and ethics for such a thing. I also cautioned them that this isn't a guarantee or something they can stop anytime they want and go back on. I said.

You gave them "The One-way only!" Speech?

Almost word for word, like you did with me! I said.

I'm glad to see you remember it! He said. We chuckled together.

Monday afternoon, I got Jennifer's lab report. Her test results were completely normal, as a precaution against overdose due to her young age and her mother's excitement to have a daughter, she was prescribed estrogen patches for Jennifer's safety and well-being.

I explained the patch must be changed out every 3 to 4 days. Using more than one patch will not increase her transformation, only the side effects. Initially, I scheduled them for lab work every two weeks to monitor her progress and her body's response to the hormones and hormone levels.

Under no circumstances are you to wear more than one patch at a time. If I notice any kind of abuse with this treatment, it will be reported to the authorities and the review board! I want to help you, but my ethics and legal practice come first!

We understand! Jennifer's mother said.

I hope so! If you vary from my instructions, you risk not only custody of your daughter, but her health as well! Follow my instructions, document your life as mother and daughter, and get references from close family and friends. When the review board calls you for a meeting it's on their timeline! You get one chance to present your case. Any variation from my advice is an abuse of the treatment, and I will withdraw my support.

I understand Dr. Webb! Jennifer said.

Yes doctor! Jennifer's mother said.

Excellent! Jennifer, I'd like to see your personal diary when you come in next time! I'll see you both in two weeks!

It took almost 3 months before we received word about the review board! During that time Jennifer followed my instructions to the letter. Jennifer's mother brought her sister and daughter, as well as Jennifer's best friend and her mother. Jennifer had over 500 pages of her personal diary! Jennifer's mother also had a diary.

The week in Chicago was as every bit thoroughly performed as mine was! After the board interview was completed they were told they would have to wait for a decision.

Donna! A minute please! It was Dr. Chandler.

Yes Doctor!

I want to say, I'm proud of you! I followed you through college and your practice! You've exceeded all my hopes for you as a woman and a psychiatrist!

You and Dr. Reid have been great examples to follow! I said.

Donna when you have a some time, I'd like to talk to you about a book I'm writing, I'd really love your input and assistance! I think together we could shed light on identity disorder and treatment for our profession!

I'd love the idea! I said. Will you be attending the the psychiatrist convention in Atlantic City next month? I asked.

I'll be there! He said.

Another 3 months went by before hearing from the AMA committee. During that time Jennifer and her mother were committed to the program as ever. Her lab work was looking good. Her skin was visablely clear and soft. Her body was beginning to respond to the estrogen patches. Upon an examination I noticed her aerolas size had doubled, her nipples were larger. She had all the signs of breast growth and her waist and hips were reshaping themselves.

I talked to Jennifer and her mother about using her ordeal as an unamed example in the book Dr. Chandler and I were writing. They agreed on the condition that if the book was successful that we paid for Jennifer's college and set aside a payment for later to be negotiated.

We agreed.

During this time Chris and I were doing great. His practice was thriving and we were finally out of debt and saving for our dream home.

The week arrived for the committee meeting for Jennifer.Jennifer and her mother was exhausted from all the hoops she and Jennifer went through. Just like before, test after test, interview after interview with multiple doctors and therapist like myself.

We sat together in the hallway outside of the conference room waiting for what seemed like forever.

Why is this so complicated? Jennifer's mother asked! It should be obvious by now! She said.

If it was my decision alone for approval, you would have had it by now, but our profession has ethics we can't ignore just because minor and parent want it! Imagine how many children would be harmed if the parent or parents would do this against a child's will!

That's unthinkable! No parent would do this! Jennifer's mother said.

You'd be surprised! I said. It happens more often than you think! Many parents have it done overseas, away from our laws. Doing this correctly protects both of you! I said. That's part of my job! I said.

We're ready! Dr. Chandler said.

As before there was seven of us. I smiled at Dr. Reid when we sat down. She was appointed to the committee.

As you know we have discussed Jennifer's case history very closely. Do you have anything you'd like to say before we render our decision?

Jennifer got up and explained to the committee how much better her life has become since adopting life as a girl. It almost mirrored mine. Jennifer's mother, Aunt, cousin and friends all said something similar from the heart. I almost cried!

It's the committee's job to protect the patient and our profession with the highest ethics! This is a decision that can only be made once! Dr Chandler said.

Jennifer, you are approved for full hormone therapy and surgery after your 16th birthday! Call me within 60 days of your birthday and we'll put you on the books for pre screening and surgery!

I'd like to thank you for your patience in this process! It's not an easy road, the right roads are never the easiest! However they are the best roads for obtaining your goals! Good luck young lady! Your journey is just beginning!

We thanked the board and headed home.

9 months later

Doctor Chandler's book was published and released. It was given great reviews by the Medical Journals and Associations world-wide! It was a best seller for documentaries! Doctor Reid, myself were credited along with Dr. Chandler.

Doctor Chandler, Reid and myself were on all the morning shows doing interviews. The response was overwhelming positive for the most part. We were even complimented on the care and cautious nature of our treatment of young people that suffered with identity dysphoria.

7 months after the book release, Jennifer went in for SRS surgery. During her hospital stay her estranged father showed up protesting her surgery. He slapped his ex-wife in the hallway and was arrested by the police! He was never heard from again.

Because of the success of the book. My practice was thriving so much I opened a second office 40 minutes away, closer to Atlanta.

Chris and I bought our dream home in cash.

Jennifer's surgery was done at no expense by Dr. Chandler. We kept our word and set Jennifer up with a college fund that would cover her every need including graduate school. A one time payment of 300 thousand dollars was paid to Jennifer and her mother for their input.

Chris and I are doing great! My mother sold her home and moved to Savannah to be closer, we bought her a nice two bedroom condo. My mom never remarried.

Amy, Tammy and I are still close.

We get together every year in the summer over the 4th July at Tammy's parents home. The Pippen's were once my enemy, now they are close friends, like family! In my darkest days I just wanted to die and end my pain and suffering. With the help of Charlene, a complete stranger at the time, I found myself risking everything and trusting her. It was single best decision I ever made besides marrying Chris.

My Journey through life wasn't easy by any imagination. The right road isn't easy, but the rewards are more than worth it!

Chris and I may not have children but thanks to his brothers we have two nieces and two nephews to love and look after from time to time. My mother often helps out with them.

My New Normal started the day my mother put me in a dress. I thought my world would end. It was only the beginning of an incredible journey I was able to share thanks to Dr. Chandler! The real closure of my trauma was given to me by Jennifer. Thanks to her, I know I chose the correct path in life.

Thank you for reading my story, I have to go now. My next patient is waiting.

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